Happiness is in and around.,

My train to Chennai for a home weekend was scheduled for 9 pm. I had to rush in to reach the station as I had started late after sitting through till the end of a thrilling cricket match. Cricket was something which always had more priority than most things in life for most people, especially for me. The clock showed 8.40 pm when I huffed and puffed to the boarding point in the train with my heavy baggage of clothes. I made sure my washing machine at home was given a hefty load every time I got back home. I put the bags under the seat and got down to pick up some things to crunch and drink, having had dinner on the run.

"Coffee", I ordered to the IRCTC stall keeper.
He made me a cup of ground coffee and kept it by me.
I lifted the cup and bought it up and close to my nose. I sucked in the hot flavor of the rich South-Indian coffee. Only few things on earth can beat a well-made coffee.
I also got myself a packet of lays to serve my company as it often bores to travel alone.

It was almost time for the train to leave, and I got into it. I occupied my seat in the train cabin which had a mixed bunch of co-passengers.

What immediately caught my eye was a cute, 5 year old girl in the company of her father. The father seemed a patient young man. It needed patience indeed, to feed his daughter the packed dinner.

"Have this bite, your last one for the day", he had urged the kid for every bite.
"You can't cheat me. I have already had my last bite 5 times", replied the grumpy girl turning away her face.
The young father smiled at his daughter's comment as he soon realized his persuading techniques were past their age for his bright kid.
The man badly needed his wife to be have been around. His mind-voice praised his wife's deeds in achieving this herculean task day-in and day-out. Gentlemen shower the wives with adorable words only when they have missed them the most.
However, he hadn't given up. The fatherhood in him kept him going at the task, but a bit of frustration had crept in than before though.

I watched all this in awe as I sipped in my beaming coffee enjoying every bit of it on a moving train's breeze.

"If you eat, I will buy you a chocolate", in went one bite.
"See the crow there", she took in another in amusement.
"Only if you eat, you will grow big like me", she chewed in a quick few bites in realization.

"If you do not eat, this anna would catch hold of you", he alarmed pointing to me.
For a quick moment I wondered if I had appeared so threatening to be an example for what I was.
I knew I atleast had to act so, to do my bit for the kid's dinner.
"Yes, if you don't finish that Dosa, I will finish you", I said far from deceptive even to a child.
"hahaha!!!", the girl laughed out her last bite of dosa seeing my funny act.
I knew I had a chance in Tamil films being as worse as an actor that I was for a minute.

Finally, her dinner was over. Her father felt so proud of it. He seemed like he had conquered the invincible thing. The child got back to its playful self. Her Dosa-spread-mouth and the always-eager-eyes didn't leave my mind for the night.

Across my side were a son and mother who were keeping mum for most times. The bachelor-son was engrossed with his mobile. His mother was left with no company. She seemed to be worried, perhaps in mind of her responsibilities. The son, I presumed, had his share of worries with his girlfriend on texts.

By now, I had finished my lays packet with the scenes of life of my co-passengers keeping me interested.

By my other side, was two middle aged people, who were chatting profusely about banks and banking regulations, Apparently, they worked in different banks. They stressed on the pros and cons of each other's bank to win the argument. I wondered if they had a trophy to win on conclusion. They even for a minute didn't live life, only catering to their egos.

As I took insight of all this, I realized a few things. They were strangers to me, so for a very rare occasion I was viewing people as what they actually are but not as what I saw them to be. Being not related to them made devoid personal equations and helped me understand how people actually live each other's lives. People, I saw, were so engaged in life that the evident happiness in and around one's self went unnoticed. To the feeding father, it was a test of his temper. For the argumentative banking co-passengers, it was a battlefield with self-pride at stake. For the bachelor-son, life was not where he physically was. For his mother, it was about her non-existent son. To me, whose perspective was detached from their stresses of 'self-life', it meant the small little beautiful things around them that they themselves had failed to notice. The father had missed in his frustration to enjoy the child's nature. The self-possessed minds had a mind-block to think beyond "I, ME, MYSELF", which amounts to nothing. 

Once one is clouded with self thoughts he/she loses to live life. Only when one takes 'self' out from his/her system, would one have time for their 'real life'. By 'real life' I mean, what nature gives us- the sound of rain, the chirps of birds, the warmth of the sun, the chill of breeze and the music by the river. Real Life is in a cry, in a smile, in a word. It is in a cuddle, in a pat and in a touch. It motivates to find something to like and enjoy in each of the things around us. 'Self life' hardly keeps open our hearts and senses to the happiness around us. It only urges to go in search of a self-goal blind-folding whatever one's senses may like to feel that are evidently close-by. It only leaves one to find something to dislike and complain in each of the things around us.

As I went to bed on my train birth, I was certain that only when I took out all the 'first-person-possessive' words from my dictionary, I would live LIFE. Until then, I would be a mechanical entity whose search is always a constant and its realization possibly never. It is easier said than done to remove the self from one's thoughts. It is difficult than it may seem but it is not impossible. After all, every individual is made up of his/her egos; the lesser one shows it, the more beautiful they get to be known.

Cheers and Regards,
nagappstheblogger!!!

The Gender Rule

Human kind, like any other living species, has two basic forms of life as designed and designated by the creator. From tiny ants to the mighty elephants, life on earth is categorically either masculine or feminine. Now there must be a motive for this creative genius of God more than just the cause for reproduction. Looking beyond reproducing, what is God trying to let us know by differences in the character and nature within the same species? Is he meaning to say each of them are different to take up different roles in life? Does he not mean to say both are equally capable?

Whatever he may have meant to say, I am afraid, that hasn't definitely reached us correctly for now. At least to we, the human race.

If it was so designed that only one gender existed, to live life and possibly biologically reproduce with only the same, what would have been the intricacies? Obvious enough, survival wouldn't have even been possible with the world being a battle for existence, with no motive to show kindness. With creation of the second gender, God had done a masterstroke, thus inventing 'love'.

Now every man had a reason to live and not die- 'a woman';  every woman had a reason to live and not die- 'a man'. Survival would be without question. 'Love' would be the reason for living beings to want to cheat death. God always wanted nature to be the only reason for death as it is for birth. A man would always have a women to fall upon to wipe off his tears in a failure. He would have a soul to satisfy and make happy. A women would have a man to empower and mean happiness to. Unfortunately, if only, all this got to the human race's mind in the right way.

Co-existence and not Inferior-superior Complexes should mean to each other. If 'men' are defined in character as protective, hard-headed, ambitious souls, the reason they are designed so is only to serve their feminine love with their warmth and achievements and thereby to realize subsequent happiness. If 'women' are synonymous to responsible, understanding, decisive, lovable souls, they are built so by nature only to support their man and be the shoulder of strength in his pursuit of success. This doesn't mean to a decimal point that one is stronger than the other. I can surely defend saying, if men are physically dominant, women are mentally. So I believe undoubtedly, nature always evens out traits in genders to promote co-existence and not be a reason for dominance. 

The world society still working for equal women rights is a pity. That is their birth right from nature. The cause for the men domineering is a case of improper understanding of civilization through the ages of history.

Civilization through religion devised an effective way of family functioning for the goodness of existence. Men who had the physical strength to work the day had to be protect the interest of women; women seen to have more mental strength took care of the well-being of the household. I always believe a family's challenges are any day bigger than work's. The civilization knew the more difficult part had to be bestowed upon women. They lay such a road map to peace as only women were strong enough to be adaptive, prioritize love and help their men achieve great things as a result triumph in making a successful home. It was a well-designed template where it was believed every success of a man was a women's and a women's success was as a result of their man's. They lived for each other and thus co-existed. Unfortunately over the generations that was misunderstood as women are not more than good enough to be at home. This misinterpretation of culture started to be the beginning of the world's most precious resource, the women, going wasted.

How beautifully had nature made women so strong to have the assertiveness to persuade a man to strive, strive and strive despite failures! How beautifully had culture said a man should always believe he can satisfy the desires of his women while a women has to always believe her man is keeping her happy. How awfully has the following generations misunderstood all this to now be thinking men had kept women restricted to homes!

For the world to move forward, I strongly feel men must see the importance of a woman's role in their lives. Nothing feels better than to live for a women of your dreams. Girls, ladies and women need to know their best qualities are patience, care and affection. Only narrow-minds would think females can't be bold or authoritative. They can even be so, even better than men. Being what men are only ruins the beauty of femininity in them. It is their role to play a positive influence on their man to help him succeed and hence eventually succeed.

This Gender Rule which when well comprehended, like it was meant to be when it had originated, should pay rich dividends in peace and harmony to the society. If I did some part in conveying, what my native culture thought me, across fresh minds to value and celebrate the company of each other's gender for a successful life then I would consider myself proud of having authored this blog.

Cheers and Regards,
nagappstheblogger